Good news everyone

I have finally gotten back to work on my first novel. I actually hadn't touched it one bit since May, but this week I finally decided it's been long enough and I dove dick-first into the editing stage. I'm currently on page 145 of 219 pages, of which each page in Word translates into at least two of their printed counterparts. It's 116,000+ words of lyrical brilliance. In fact, I completely forgot how good a writer I was. The last six months I've been scared to go back and read my work because I expected it to be shit. Well, I had no need to worry because as it turns out, it's not half bad.

Here's a short excerpt: 

Open the bag, filter through a bunch of crap only fat people carry around, grab the canister.

It’s Sonic Boots, a self protection device falling under the clichéd category of things in Ziomii’s bag. It’s a battery-powered, air-driven ass-kicking in a bottle, and it displaces enough atmosphere to put a hundred-kilo assailant through a brick wall.

The locker door pushes in, crimps together at the corners, and disintegrates. It’s there, and then it isn’t Emelie swipes her stuff, dumps it all in her own bag, and sprints back through the WORKING GIRLS ONLY door, making a straight path through the mutinous crowd and the parking lot.

I wrote the book in American because it makes it easier for people to understand. It's too difficult for Americans to understand European English, and yet it seems fine the other way around. Just one more reason why I hate living here in this god-awful country of fat fucks and uneducated heathens. In fact, America is just about the last place I would choose to live, short of Vietnam, anywhere in Asia, or Siberia. Actually, take that back: Siberia would be just fine with me. I hate summer and I love winter and the cold and the snow and the ice and snuggling under some heavy blankets naked. Yeah: fuck winter. Fuck it fuck it

fuck it

WHATEVER. 

I still want to kill myself, but at least now I'm going to at least wait until I've put this book in a state ready for reading.